"When you wake up, I hope I'm always somewhere deep inside you" While just laying in bed exhausted but mind running last night I was thinking about how you are leaving pretty soon. And of course it gives me a whirlwind of emotions.
I'm so excited for you to go on your trip. Honestly, I'm excited for everything you do in your life that brings something into your heart. I'm happy that you will be with friends. I'm happy you will be in nature. I'm happy you will get to eat good. I'm happy you choose to do something that YOU want to do rather than fall into the cycle of the everyday things we do here. And I'm just happy for you to reset.
I'm nervous. I'm nervous to be forgotten. I'm nervous that you find that you don't want me anymore. I'm nervous that theirs something more that you find that makes you accept that everything with me was a mistake and not real.
But the first outweighs the second. I wish you watched anime because in the Attack on Titan finale the main character finally breaks down. He's been doing stuff for everyone else pretending to be fine but breaks down about his lover. And it's the most embarrassing thing ever but he finally talks about how he doesnt want to die. How he doesnt want to lose his lover. And so many other things and Im honestly laughing thinking about it. I didnt explain it well because the story is crazy intricate. But yeah I dont want you to forget about me. I just want your heart to be okay. Hopefully thats what is going to heal my shattered heart over time.
PS How the hell did you reply? Was that real? Was it a glitch? I feel like I was in the matrix and you came to say wake up. Im here. Like a ghost. And out of all the things to say I didnt expect that. Crazy. I saw it while I was in the process of signing up for costco in my email. Crazy.